When I think of family trees, I think of generations of loved ones passing on words of wisdom and stories of love and magic. If there is a lineage to who I am as a person and some insight into why I am musically inclined and allergic to crab, I haven't found it. I am the spitting image of my Mom, right down to the core; except nobody knows where my nose came from. As I build my own family and think about adding to the limbs, I want to reflect on the family that made me who I am today and the family that opened their arms and placed me into their tree.
Both of my Grandads are rambunctious and I doubt they have ever had a boring day in their life. My Grandad Moser found his love for whiskey at the age of twelve. I found mine at the age of fourteen in a tree house with a childhood friend before heading off to drum lessons. Grandad married my Grandmother right out of high school and she was sweet enough to put up with him until he lost his battle to alcoholism. I miss our talks about horses and dogs; sitting on the bed of his truck, sneaking nips of Jack Daniels. I think what I miss the most is his brutal honesty. When I asked him if he would ever quit drinking, he would say 'probably not'.
My Grandpa Johnson rode up on his horse to my Granny's school bus and told her to get off because he was going to marry her. She told him she wouldn't marry him unless he quit smoking. So standing in a hay field, he took his last drag. They are married to this day and if you listen closely, you can almost hear their boots dancing in rhythm across a barn floor. Of course you can also hear Grandpa telling Granny he will come back to haunt her if he is the first to go.
My parents went to the same high school in the same small town. Dad had big city dreams and enough confidence to carry him through. Mom loved horses but gave up her dream of riding in rodeos to put my Dad through law school. She loved him enough to help make his dreams come true. I like to think my parents were in love and were wishing on dreams together when I came along. Laura followed two years after me and despite my best efforts to get them to throw her away, she is still here. We had a wonderful early childhood. We were able to be kids and since we both have healthy imaginations, there was never a country we couldn't conquer or a hole we couldn't dig. Simply stated, we were happy.
I found my love for writing at an early age. My parents divorced when Laura and I were old enough to know what was happening but too young to understand. The court made us go to a counseling program called Sandcastles. Laura painted her pain away as I watched in envy. One of the counselors asked me what my hobbies were and I told her I liked to make scrapbooks of dogs and I liked to make up songs. She told me to try and write a poem. I wrote a poem about a puppy who loses her home because nobody wants her. The counselor told me it was great and that's all the inspiration I needed. I was going to be a poetry writer! Through the rest of high school, I locked myself in my bedroom every day after school and I wrote poem after poem.
When I started college, I realized how much fun it was to write short stories and analyze writers like Dante and Homer. Thus, my love for writing came full circle. English and Writing were the only classes I received A's in and where I felt most comfortable. I am thankful our parents loved us enough to get us the help we needed to cope with the divorce. Laura has gone on to pursue her love for the arts and I think we finally have an understanding for who we are as individuals. It took many tears and years of therapy but I feel as if I know my place in the world.
I used to think that since my family was broken, we weren't really a family. I felt this way when I met Clint's family. Jeff and Linda's home is tucked away in the woods and looks like something right out of a fairy tale. The first time I stepped into their home, I was flooded with warmth and the presence of love. Tyler and Aaron were little at the time and they looked at Clint like he hung the moon. They fought for his attention and I completely fell in love with them. Linda treated me like she had known me forever and we quickly bonded over books and Oprah. Jeff sat quietly in the background playing his guitar and I spent the whole weekend wondering what he was thinking!
After that weekend, I wanted so bad to be a part of that family. Of course I told Clint that on our drive back to Little Rock and he told me that family is what you make it. I did a lot of thinking and growing up over the next few months. I took on a new attitude and decided that maybe my step-dad wasn't so bad and I needed to learn to take advantage of the time I got to spend with my Dad. I couldn't change the past and I wanted my future to be warm and peaceful.
Some family trees come with broken branches and thorns that are quick to draw blood. It's what you do with those trees that define what family is. I took parts of my family tree, uprooted it, and planted it with parts of Clint's family tree and now I have a unique bonsai. It will never be perfect and I don't want it to be. I have so many colorful memories from my life that help make me who I am. I have two parents that love me, no matter what. It doesn't matter that my Dad is in prison or that my Mom is re-married. It's not necessarily a bad thing. I spend more time now than I ever have with my Dad and my Mom is truly happy. She has found new passions for hunting and fishing and for the first time in her life, she is not afraid to swim in the ocean. It's nice to see your parents happy and enjoying life.
I love my family. I love the stories behind my Grandparents and I love my parents for never giving up on Laura and I. I love my in-laws for taking the time to get to know me and for believing in Clint and I. I love my husband for showing me that I had a family all along; I just needed to learn how to nourish it.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Monday, January 12, 2009
Where Our Story Begins
Clint and I have been married for almost a whole year but our story begins seven years ago in a hotel room in Little Rock, AR....
I first met Clint at my eighteenth birthday party, which I was hosting in a hotel room. He came with my cousin, Wade, and their friends from Conway. I immediately set my eyes on Clint and my life hasn't been the same since. If you ask him, I was way too young for a college senior, which is what Clint was at the time. Fortunately for me, he quickly overlooked my age once we started to get to know each other. For the next four years we were in a dream. We shared many of the same interests. We loved listening to up and coming bands at Juanita's and spending the weekends at his house watching movies and hanging out with his friends. We loved to travel and go on dates. Clint became my best friend and I knew that one day, this was the man I would spend the rest of my life with. He is my constant. I knew that no matter what life threw at us, he would be there.
I graduated from UCA in the Spring of 2006 and awoke from my dream. Suddenly, I was lost. I have been dealing with one crisis after another from a very young age and for once there was nothing wrong with my life. I didn't know how to react or to adapt to a world with no problems. I freaked out and confronted my deepest fears. After I re-evaluated my life, Clint and I started year number five closer than I ever imagined I could be with another human being. We picked up where we left off, except this time, I was a different person. I became happy and started to enjoy the little things in life. I knew that 2007 would be a year of changes and contentment. There was just one little problem. I was ready to get married. Right then. Let's go, let's do this and start our life as Mr. and Mrs. Mickle! I think it took Clint by surprise because I had never been that persistent about getting married. Here we were, living this wonderful life. Why mess it up? Why take the next step? All I can say is that was what my heart was telling me. I knew I was ready; that we were ready.
For my birthday that year, Clint brought home a ten pound pit bull. He was the cutest thing I had ever seen (and still is). We were in awe of this little puppy. The biggest thing on him at the time was his belly. Little did we know, his head and paws would soon catch up! We weren't sure what to name him, so that first night we observed him. I was at the stove and Clint was on the couch. The puppy was sitting by Clint on the floor, facing me. All of I sudden, I saw his little muscles move! Clint suggested the name FLEX, and I knew it was the perfect name for this addition to our family. So, FLEX Bonebreaker Mickle came into our lives that January night and it hasn't been the same since. We did everything with him. After all, he was going to be the most well-behaved, loved pit bull in the world. He's not. Don't get me wrong, he is definitely the most loved but he is no where near well-behaved. We were determined to break the stereotypes about pit bulls. Instead, FLEX did that on his own. He is attached to me at the hip. He loves his Daddy and when Clint is not at home with us, it is FLEX who protects the family. He will only sit, shake and lay down for treats and he doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do. He snores with his eyes open and he pouts. He is also stubborn. It's like he took the combined bad qualities that Clint and I have and put them together. There will be many more blogs on FLEX, so I will get back to how Clint and I came to be married.
On Labor Day weekend of 2007, Clint took me to Petit Jean Mountain. This is special to us because it was where we spent our one year anniversary and my nineteenth birthday. On that particular weekend, Clint and I were sitting by the fire in our little cabin and we were talking about our hopes and dreams. I asked him if he ever thought that one day we would get married. He said he did. We knew we were too young but it was the first time we ever told each other we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. Jump forward to 2007. We woke up before sunrise so we could hike to the mountain and watch the sun come up. Clint packed a cooler so we could have breakfast before our hike back. Once we got to the waterfall, he told me to sit down. I sat down and he had this strange look on his face. He dropped to one knee. Time stopped. I said yes before he could even ask me. Along with the arrival of FLEX, that was one of the best days of my life. Looking back, it was so funny and it was so perfect. Clint had packed my favorite things for us to snack on and I hiked all the way back to our cabin staring at my engagement ring. We had a quick engagement. Our commitment to each other was witnessed by our friends and family and I became Mrs. Elizabeth Claire Mickle on March 28, 2008.
The past year has been wonderful. Our first year of marriage has made me look forward to the years to come. The only thing that has really changed is my last name. Clint and I have shared seven wonderful years together, even though the law only recognizes one. I look forward to what the future brings!
I first met Clint at my eighteenth birthday party, which I was hosting in a hotel room. He came with my cousin, Wade, and their friends from Conway. I immediately set my eyes on Clint and my life hasn't been the same since. If you ask him, I was way too young for a college senior, which is what Clint was at the time. Fortunately for me, he quickly overlooked my age once we started to get to know each other. For the next four years we were in a dream. We shared many of the same interests. We loved listening to up and coming bands at Juanita's and spending the weekends at his house watching movies and hanging out with his friends. We loved to travel and go on dates. Clint became my best friend and I knew that one day, this was the man I would spend the rest of my life with. He is my constant. I knew that no matter what life threw at us, he would be there.
I graduated from UCA in the Spring of 2006 and awoke from my dream. Suddenly, I was lost. I have been dealing with one crisis after another from a very young age and for once there was nothing wrong with my life. I didn't know how to react or to adapt to a world with no problems. I freaked out and confronted my deepest fears. After I re-evaluated my life, Clint and I started year number five closer than I ever imagined I could be with another human being. We picked up where we left off, except this time, I was a different person. I became happy and started to enjoy the little things in life. I knew that 2007 would be a year of changes and contentment. There was just one little problem. I was ready to get married. Right then. Let's go, let's do this and start our life as Mr. and Mrs. Mickle! I think it took Clint by surprise because I had never been that persistent about getting married. Here we were, living this wonderful life. Why mess it up? Why take the next step? All I can say is that was what my heart was telling me. I knew I was ready; that we were ready.
For my birthday that year, Clint brought home a ten pound pit bull. He was the cutest thing I had ever seen (and still is). We were in awe of this little puppy. The biggest thing on him at the time was his belly. Little did we know, his head and paws would soon catch up! We weren't sure what to name him, so that first night we observed him. I was at the stove and Clint was on the couch. The puppy was sitting by Clint on the floor, facing me. All of I sudden, I saw his little muscles move! Clint suggested the name FLEX, and I knew it was the perfect name for this addition to our family. So, FLEX Bonebreaker Mickle came into our lives that January night and it hasn't been the same since. We did everything with him. After all, he was going to be the most well-behaved, loved pit bull in the world. He's not. Don't get me wrong, he is definitely the most loved but he is no where near well-behaved. We were determined to break the stereotypes about pit bulls. Instead, FLEX did that on his own. He is attached to me at the hip. He loves his Daddy and when Clint is not at home with us, it is FLEX who protects the family. He will only sit, shake and lay down for treats and he doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do. He snores with his eyes open and he pouts. He is also stubborn. It's like he took the combined bad qualities that Clint and I have and put them together. There will be many more blogs on FLEX, so I will get back to how Clint and I came to be married.
On Labor Day weekend of 2007, Clint took me to Petit Jean Mountain. This is special to us because it was where we spent our one year anniversary and my nineteenth birthday. On that particular weekend, Clint and I were sitting by the fire in our little cabin and we were talking about our hopes and dreams. I asked him if he ever thought that one day we would get married. He said he did. We knew we were too young but it was the first time we ever told each other we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. Jump forward to 2007. We woke up before sunrise so we could hike to the mountain and watch the sun come up. Clint packed a cooler so we could have breakfast before our hike back. Once we got to the waterfall, he told me to sit down. I sat down and he had this strange look on his face. He dropped to one knee. Time stopped. I said yes before he could even ask me. Along with the arrival of FLEX, that was one of the best days of my life. Looking back, it was so funny and it was so perfect. Clint had packed my favorite things for us to snack on and I hiked all the way back to our cabin staring at my engagement ring. We had a quick engagement. Our commitment to each other was witnessed by our friends and family and I became Mrs. Elizabeth Claire Mickle on March 28, 2008.
The past year has been wonderful. Our first year of marriage has made me look forward to the years to come. The only thing that has really changed is my last name. Clint and I have shared seven wonderful years together, even though the law only recognizes one. I look forward to what the future brings!
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